By Aaron Allen
The Seattle Medium
We all have experience adversity and adversity can be as diverse and unique as the people on the planet. Bad things can happen to anyone, at any given time and in unexpected ways.
When we experience adversity how should we respond? This piece places the spotlight on a person whose story presents a prime of example of overcoming hard times. Jamie Elmore, who owns a local hair salon, is an example of someone who has overcome adversity through action, faith and believing.
Elmore — who was diagnosed with Alopecia areata, an autoimmune disease causing hair loss on the scalp, face and sometimes on other areas of the body – has not only overcome her own challenges with Alopecia, but she has become a global ambassador to help others understand, cope and liberate themselves from the mental effects of hair loss.
A published writer, advocate and activist living in Seattle, Elmore is a rarity in the Pacific Northwest being a Black business owner. Successful, intelligent and creative she has been in business since the early 1990s. A graduate of Garfield High School, Elmore began her journey as young girl in love with hair. She loved doing hair, hair of dolls, siblings and friends, according to Elmore, this was her calling.
“Growing up I always played with my dolls hair, always was playing with my sister’s, my cousin’s hair, I just knew I had a longing to do hair,” says Elmore.
After graduating from high school, Elmore went on to become a licensed cosmetologist and upon graduation from cosmetology schools she immediately started her own business. She had this dream since a little girl and she attained it. The path seemed golden, and success was around every corner.
In 1993, she became a mother and was immediately hit with adversity as her baby girl was born with severe medical conditions. As Elmore held the hand of her daughter through 10 major brain surgeries, while simultaneously trying to build a business, her faith began to get the upper hand in this universal battle and over the years her daughter began to heal and grow stronger. But during that time adversity was still lingering in the form of stress on her body.
Relocating seemed liked a good idea so Elmore sold her Seattle salon and moved to Louisiana where she established herself in business and began to thrive.
Adversity would rear its head again as Elmore’s daughter would become critically ill again while visiting family in Seattle. Elmore had to pack up her business and relocate back to Seattle and care for her child.
Although she maintained a stone front her spirit was looking for answers and help to battle adversity as she stood grounded in her faith. According to Elmore, sometimes human beings can have a negative experience, believe their handling things and that they’re alright, but inside stress is wreaking havoc on our bodies and stress can trigger many different things in the body without us ever realizing it until.
“With all types of things going on, my daughter’s medical, I didn’t realize the amount of stress that was going on in my life and my body,” recalled Elmore.
Everything about the hair business is built around the health of your hair, beauty, and the perception that comes with it. How we see ourselves and others, as in most other aspects of life and in the business of beauty first impressions and perception is important.
As a hair designer her knowledge, education, service is about hair care and on a hot and humid day Elmore noticed something about her hair. A round patch of hair was missing. She didn’t see it fall out, it did not get entangled with her fingers as she washed her hair, it was just gone, and had disappeared.
“I never saw my hair, I never saw my hair in my hand,” said Elmore of the experience. “I never saw my hair on my pillow and that was the mystery behind this for me, because I would go to bed at night, wake up and find a bald spot and it looked like someone just took an eraser and erased hair of my head.”
As a hair care specialist, this was a troubling and ironic occurrence in itself. She spoke with colleagues and professionals regarding it and they all advised her to giving it some time to correct itself, however, over a period of months it happened again and again. She began losing her hair at an alarming rate.
“I just knew that I was losing my hair and I was scared,” she explained. “I was scared, here I am servicing clients but I could not fix myself. All I knew was that my hair was leaving me, disappearing, that was the biggest mystery, never saw it.”
Mentally, Elmore was struggling for answers. How was she going to explain this hair loss to her daughter, her friends, co-workers and clients? What about relationships? Will men find her attractive? The scenarios swirled in her head and heart, particularly regarding her daughter and it took a long time before she mustered the courage to tell her daughter.
It was important to Elmore to instill in her daughter the importance, responsibility and honor it is to be a woman, more importantly a Black woman, “I’m her example of what a woman is, how a woman should carry themselves, what a woman looks like, I’m her example, I’m ashamed, how am I going to tell this to my daughter?” said Elmore.
Elmore was eventually referred to a dermatologist and was diagnosis, Alopecia.
According to the National Alopecia Areata Foundation (NAAF), Alopecia affects as many as 6.8 million people in the United States with a lifetime risk of 2.1 percent.
“I really thought I was dying,” said Elmore. “Because my body was changing and I could feel the stress within my body.”
“When I finally went to the doctor, because enough was enough, she sat me on the table and said, ‘I think you have Alopecia,’” Elmore continued.
Elmore found herself overcome with depression, confusion and uncertainty, she began to take on this adversity with a sense of calling, beginning with her faith and of course draped in style. As she worked to heal, her “accessories”, as she likes to call them, to hide her illness grew in number and creativity, as she wore scarves, wraps and hats but the meeting of one young person changed the trajectory of her mission.
In 2009, Elmore established Alopecia Support Group (ASG) a global support group for those battling Alopecia and hair loss. She began publishing articles and sharing her experience in hopes of supporting, inspiring and encouraging others afflicted with Alopecia. She was introduced to an 11-year old girl who was struggling with the disease. As they both looked into a mirror, Elmore desperately tried to encourage the young girl pointing out the uniqueness of their beauty in the face of their illness. It was as if the words not only addressed the needs of the young girl but Elmore’s as well. This meeting propelled Elmore to act.
“Alopecia has caused me to look at things a little different,” says Elmore. “I believe everybody has a story, it may not be my story, but you have a story, Alopecia just happens to be mine.”
As she fought her illness, depression and weight loss as well as trying to be strong for her family, it was Elmore’s friends and family who finally convinced her that it was time to cut the remaining hair from her head and accept the boldness in her baldness. It was then that she turned a negative reaction into a positive and beautiful response.
Through these challenges, Elmore and her daughter have grown strong together as both have become lecturers, authors and activist, sharing their experiences in the hopes of inspiring others around the world.
Through ASG her message is spread around the world through lectures, media (radio and television) representing Alopecia sufferers, giving them hope that all is not lost, that change can be a beautiful, strengthening and enlightening experience. According to Elmore, even in the face of adversity the only perception one must adhere to is self perception. The love of self first and then the love from others will follow.
Alopecia forced her to re-evaluate perception, that the outside pales in comparison to what is inside of you. People change, we can’t escape that, but how we accept our change, embrace our change can make the difference in whether the growth is positive or negative. Elmore and ASG want to make sure your experience is as positive as possible.
“What comes to my mind and I say it often is, the mirror,” explains Elmore. “What do you see when you look in the mirror? The mirror doesn’t lie, steal or cheat, it’s honest, it calls you by name. So, when you look in the mirror of your life are you happy? If you’re not we have the ability to change what we see in the mirror and it’s not necessarily the physical mirror, I am more than my hair.”
