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Thursday, December 4, 2025

What Should We Tell Our Sons?

Gary L. Flowers
Gary L. Flowers

 By Gary L. Flowers

NNPA Columnist

Last week’s injustice to the life and legacy of Trayvon Martin takes its  infamous place in the annals of United States history, along with the 1857 Dred  Scott Supreme Court ruling, the 1896 Plessy v. Ferguson court ruling, the  1955 Emmett Till murder, and the 1963 fire hosing and church bombing of Black  children in Birmingham, Ala., and the 2010 murder Oscar Grant while in  handcuffs.  Each was a singular moment in American history, yet reminded  the world of the unequal justice and “open season” on Black people in  America.  As was the question of Black families then, today, following the  targeting of Trayvon, Black parents sense another “open season” and are  asking:  What should we tell our sons?

In an ideal America parents—of any color—should only tell their sons to be  honest, hard working, faithful, fair, and respectful, among other virtues.   Of course, the America in which we live, filled with the false notion of White  supremacy, is a tale of two turnouts for boys whose names begin with the letter  T.  Imagine one is named Trevor.  One is named Trayvon.

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Trevor is White, blonde-haired and blue-eyed.  Trayvon is Black,  brown-haired and brown-eyed.  Both Trevor and Trayvon are typical teenage  boys who are testing their proverbial “wings” in life.  Both seemingly have  much life in front of them.  Both Trevor and Trayvon’s parents love them  dearly.  Yet, when each exits their respective homes, the feelings of their  parents are virtually in two different worlds.  The White parents have no  fear their son will be racially profiled.  The Black parents knows that racial profiling of their son is a real and, perhaps, regular  possibility.  We know how Trayvon’s life so violently ended.

Now that we have analyzed and been agitated to action by the acquittal of  Trayvon’s murderer, Black parents should tell their sons 0 things:

1. Dress like you wish to be treated.  Police and “want-to-be” cops  profile certain dress such as no belts, sagging pants, white tank tops  etc.   Although wearing a hoodie in the rain, as Trayvon did, should  be free from profiling.

2. Take driver’s license photo with blazer, white shirt and tie (at  least white shirt and tie), unless you choose cultural attire.

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3. Give your name and ask their name, if asked for identification.

4. Be polite, without being pious; cordial, without being cowardly.

5. Pull over in nearest lighted area.

6. Turn on interior lights in car.

7. Place hands on top of steering wheel.

8. Announce intention to reach for wallet or identification.

9. Call Police immediately after traffic stop and identify location to  ensure that there was an official stop recorded by Police dispatch.

10. Write detailed account of stop.

 

Moreover, we must teach our sons competence, courage, commitment, and  compassion.  We must teach them Black history.  We must teach them  past legal gains can be reversed if each generation does not remain vigilant. We  must teach them that American economic downturns most often lead to a rise in  racism against Black people.   We must teach them not to feel entitled  to anything.  We must teach them that an empty intellect makes the most  noise.  We must teach them that ideas are intellectual currency.  We  must teach that comfort breeds complacency.  We must teach them that  injustice, like Italian Dressing, must be shaken.  We must teach them that  the garden of the mind must be cultivated for weeds. We must teach them that a  liar is worst than a thief. We must teach them a good reputation is worth  riches.   We must teach them their aspirations should exceed their  grasp. Lastly, we must teach our sons that we are the composite of all whose  memory we cherish.

Trayvon’s tragedy is marbled in our memory, and should inspire all  conscientious Americans to sharpen our swords against injustice, wherever it may  be, and to whomever it may be targeted.

Gary L. Flowers is executive director and CEO of the Black Leadership  Forum, Inc.

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